During times of great drama come times of great need, though I think when it was said they weren’t referring to forty foot tall celebrities. Rome, still fairly sexy whether in a billboard or extra-extra-extra-extra-large smock, could still appeal to the average guy naked (her genetic defect did not seem to affect her proportions in any way). Although it had taken many years, incredible amounts of suffering on everyone’s part, the majority of Muslims in the world had become rational, fun-loving, and stereotyped as being good at physics. Yet there were still one or two extremist sects left. One of these groups managed to take over an Interstellar Moon Jet. It wasn’t actually interstellar and didn’t actually ever go to the moon, but it was capable of doing it and the owners never failed to point this fact out. The problem was that there was enough nuclear fuel power on the jet (to enable speedy 24/7 global travel) to level a fairly large city. This particular radical Muslim sect, happening to also be incredibly good at physics, purchased dozens of tickets on one particular flight headed to L.A. and knew precisely how to set the reactor to finally level the American Entertainment Industry once and for all. They took over the flight with ease and were fully prepared to annihilate all of Los Angeles. Yet one Muslim-American did not fail in his patriotic duty and love of Hollywood to phone city officials and explain to them a key tenant of this Muslim sect. All forms of extremism require equally extreme laws to equalize their behavior and this group was no different. As the Muslim-American explained, “They believe that if they see a naked woman who isn’t their wife, they cannot under any circumstances get into paradise. No, I don’t know why they believe that, maybe you can tell me why people think Elvis is still alive. THE FUCKING POINT? THE FUCKING POINT IS THAT IF YOU JUST SHOW A NAKED WOMAN TO THEM BEFORE THEY CRASH THE PLANE, THEY’LL BELIEVE THEY WON’T GET INTO HEAVEN. Maybe they’ll turn the planes around you idiot!” I know there isn’t any way to prove this, but I think the Muslim-American who called was a Rome Facepage fan.
